Pinhead Percy
by Lady Lance
Summary: Percy gets turned into his prefect badge; Oliver takes care of him and begins to fall in love...or does he? Sometimes love doesn't survive all.


It started in Transfigurations.  
  
McGonagall had been having a rough day-something about a lost bet with Snape with a forfeit too disturbing for the students to contemplate-so that when her class of sixth year Gyrffindor and Slytherins came in, she gave them a nice vague assignment. "Turn something animate into the inanimate object of your choice. Verisimilitude counts."  
  
Of course, this was possibly the worse thing she could have given to a class of rowdy, competitive boys-especially Slytherin ones-who had the disturbing tendency of knowing more magic for someone their age then they ought to.  
  
And so, as soon as McGonagall disappeared into her office to grab a phial of Headache-Away, a Slytherin pointed his wand at the Perfect Prefect, shouted "Praeficio insigne!" and in a flash of green light, Percy Weasley disappeared, leaving one perfect prefect badge.  
  
As the Slytherin lazily leaned into grab the badge, Oliver Wood snatched it away from him. "Percy! Is that you?"  
  
Marcus Flint, second time sixth-year rolled his eyes. "Well, obviously, Wood. Are you that daft? We all watched it happen"  
  
Wood glared at Flint. "She didn't mean for us to change *people* into inanimate objects!"  
  
"Should have been more careful in what she assigned us then, shouldn't she?" said a smirking Montague, who was really quite proud of the fact that his spell has worked as intended.  
  
Suddenly the sharp voice of McGonagall interrupted the stare-off between the Gryffindor and two Slytherins. "And what is going on here?"  
  
Wood pointed a finger at Montague, "Professor! They turned Percy Weasley into a Prefect badge!" He held the badge out neatly in the other hand in a form of proof.  
  
"Montague! You really should have known better! Fifty points from Slytherin!"  
  
All the Slytherins in the room groaned at that proclamation. "Still, for accomplishing such a difficult feat, I award Slytherin twenty-five points."  
  
Twenty-five points down was certainly better then fifty, and McGonagall was never one to be generous with praise. And besides, Percy was still a badge. Slytherins decided to accept the situation as rather good instead of dwelling on the deducted points.  
  
"Er. Can you change him back, Professor?"  
  
"I shall certainly try, Mr. Wood. Set him down on that table over there."  
  
Oliver did as asked, and with a flick of her wanted, chanted "Finite Incantatum!"  
  
Nothing happened.  
  
"Er, Professor. He's still a pin." Everyone around him nodded and general commentary flooded the air.  
  
"Yes, I can see that Mr. Wood," she said, perhaps a little testily. She tried again.  
  
Percy was still a pin.  
  
"Gentlemen, what spell did you use on Percy?"  
  
" Praeficio insigne, Professor." Montague, replied.  
  
McGonagall frowned, "I should have been able to remove the spell. Perhaps the fact that it was used on a person, instead of an animal modified the results of the spell. You'd best go talk to Professor Dumbledore, Wood."  
  
"Aye, Professor."  
  
"As for the rest of you, you'll go to your seats and write me a six inch essay on why we don't use inanimate object transformations on humans!"  
  
The class groaned, someone threw something in the general direction of the Slytherins, and Wood ducked out of class, Percy-pin attached neatly to his robes. When he got to the giant Gargoyle that guarded the staircase to Dumbledore's office, Oliver realized that he didn't know the password.  
  
"Well, damn." Wood scratched his head. He looked down at the pin. "Well, now what do I do?"  
  
"I would advise returning to class, Mr. Wood," came the silky tones of a rather bemused Potions professor. "What are you doing outside of it?" Snape took a second look at Wood's robes. "And why are you wearing a Prefect's badge? Last time I knew, Weasley still had that honor."  
  
Wood swallowed, and looked around nervously. "Well, you see, Professor."  
  
"Hurry on with it, Wood, before I start taking points."  
  
Wood sighed. "That pin is Percy Weasley, sir. One of your Slytherins transfigured him in class while Professor McGonagall was out, and she can't change him back."  
  
"Oh dear, what a terrible predicament." Snape reached for the pin and swiped a finger across it. "They certainly did do a fine job of the transfiguration, it looks exactly as it should." Snape stepped back. "I suppose you were sent here so Dumbledore could try and change them back?"  
  
"Yes, sir."  
  
"I do find it interesting that Professor McGonagall couldn't change him back. Perhaps she'll think twice before she makes another wager with me." A smirk tugged on Snape's lips that made Oliver shudder. "I could try and end it, if you'd like, or do you insist on seeing the Headmaster?"  
  
Oliver replied, "I do. I mean, I want to see Dumbledore"  
  
Snape scowled slightly, but motioned for Oliver to stand under the statue. Oliver moved into position.  
  
With a gesture and a curt "Chocolate frogs" the staircase began to move, and soon Snape was out of sight.  
  
Wood sagged in relief and smiled at the badge. "That was close, wasn't it? At least he didn't take any points away."  
  
The stairs stopped, and Oliver walked into the inner sanctum of Dumbledore. He'd never been up here before-few students ever had that privilege. Between the paintings of the prior Headmasters, the books, and the magical artifacts that lined the office, it was a humbling place, reminding you of the power that Dumbledore had, and that which he lacked. Oliver turned in a slow circle, taking it all in while trying to find Dumbledore.  
  
"Um? Hello? Is anyone there?"  
  
A large bird squawked.  
  
"Must be Fawkes," Oliver muttered to himself. He was rather familiar with the stories of Harry's adventures, even if he hadn't actually heard them from Harry himself.  
  
"Ah.Mr. Wood. What can I do for you?" Dumbledore slowly headed down the stairs to his desk.  
  
Oliver fumbled with the pin on his robe. "There was a slight accident in Transfigurations." He pushed the pin towards Dumbledore. "That sir, is Percy Weasley."  
  
"Oh dear. Professor McGonagall couldn't lift the spell?"  
  
Wood felt like a bit of a broken record. "No sir, she tried though."  
  
There was a reminiscent twinkle in Dumbledore's eye. "Ah well, next time we settle bets, we'll not do it in the middle of the week." The humor in his voice made Wood wish he'd been there to see what happened. "I can try a few spells, if you'd like, but if I'm not mistaken, this may be the kind of spell where we just have to wait for it to wear off."  
  
"Well, I'm pretty sure that if Percy had his say, he'd like to come back to us sooner, rather then later, Headmaster."  
  
Dumbledore smiled politely. "I'm sure you're right. Let me see if I can do anything."  
  
Over the next hour, Oliver Wood was treated to one of the most interesting light shows he'd ever seen. Unfortunately, none of them did anything to make Percy into a human again.  
  
After the tenth attempt, Oliver rubbed his head. "I'm guessing this means that the spell won't end until Montague wants it to end, sir?"  
  
"I don't think it's quite that bad. These kinds of transfigurations usually wear off after a set period of time."  
  
"And how long is that, sir?"  
  
"It could be a few hours, or a few days at most."  
  
Dumbledore clasped Wood's shoulder. "Why don't you keen an eye on Mr. Weasley for the next few days. If the spell hasn't warn off by then, we'll talk to Montague about it."  
  
"Sir? Why can't we just ask him about it now?"  
  
"If the spell could be ended be me, I would have been able to end it. Besides, Mr. Weasley has seemed rather stressed these past few days. A little break could be just the thing he needs."  
  
Oliver blinked. "Er...if you think that's for the best, sir."  
  
"I do." Dumbledore nodded.  
  
Oliver picked up the badge and replaced it on his robe. "Well, here's hoping he comes back to us soon." He looked down upon it and smiled. "I'm sure things will be utter chaos without you around to control us."  
  
Dumbledore smiled and guided him to the door. "Have a good day, Mr. Wood, and take good care of Mr. Weasley."  
  
By the time he was able to say, "I will" again, he was back at the main hallway. "Damn. He's fast." Looking at his watch, and then at the pin, he said "Time for Potions. This ought to be interesting, won't it?"  
  
Percy naturally, said nothing.  
  
* * *  
  
To his surprise, Potions was rather boring. Snape said nothing about Percy's condition even though he could see the insult poised on the man's lips. One of the Slytherins made a comment about Percy being a pinhead, but nothing came of that except for a five-point loss from Gryffindor when Alicia Spinnet tried to defend Percy.  
  
* * * And so on it went. Over the next few days, Wood kept wearing Percy on his robes, and talking to him when he thought that they were alone. Other students just thought him mad, saying that he'd finally taken one Bludger to the head too many. Wood heard those comments, but ignored them. It felt good to talk to the eldest Weasley at the school when Percy couldn't talk back. He could finally tell him those things that he otherwise would have never said. Things like, how Percy was rather good looking in his own way and that he liked the way Percy's hair got mussed up while he slept. Or how that he could appreciate how strict Percy was about following the rules, because he'd tend to turn a blind eye when Harry or the twins were up to something that would undoubtedly lead to a loss of a lot of points by the House.  
  
He also thought that when Percy changed back he should tie him to the bed and gag him, because he liked the quiet Percy. That thought was quickly dismissed and he blamed it on too much butterbeer consumption after Quidditch practice. After all, the Percy he liked was only a silver-plated pin.  
  
Oliver knew that you couldn't love a piece of a stamped metal. * * * Ten days later, Percy turned back.  
  
Rather, a naked Percy turned back in the middle of Potions; sending both men sprawling, Wood's cauldron exploding and setting off a riot of laughter from the Slytherin side of the room.  
  
"Mr. Weasley. So nice of you to join us again, however, although you may enjoy exhibitionism, I would simply hate if another Potion's accident were to damage the Weasley's family chances at procreation, since we all know that the world doesn't have enough of you running around already. Go get dressed. Mr. Wood, go with him. Your potion is already ruined; you might as well be less of a disturbance."  
  
Oliver noted that Percy flushed a rather lovely shade of Gryffindor red, and said, "Yes Professor." He gave Percy his robe, and tugged him out into the hallway, before Snape had the opportunity to say something even more scathing, with even less subtlety.  
  
The two boys walked quickly down the hall. Percy still seemed a little dazed, so it didn't seem like a wise idea to linger. They quickly reached the entrance to the Gryffindor common room.  
  
"Harry Potter is a god."  
  
"Indeed he is, boys." The Fat Lady smiled and let the two boys through. Oliver made a note to never mock the passwords that Percy chose again. At least his were less embarrassing to say.  
  
They made there way up to the dorms. Once inside, Percy started to get dressed.  
  
"How're you feeling?"  
  
"A little confused, actually. How did I get to the potions room? And why was I naked? Last thing I remember was being in Transfigurations and Professor McGonagall looked rather.stressed."  
  
"You remember nothing, then?"  
  
Percy shook his head.  
  
"Oh." Oliver was disappointed in that. He'd hoped that maybe Percy had heard some of the things he'd about his year mate. "There was an accident in Transfiguration. You got turned into a pin, a Prefect pin, to be exact. I've been wearing you on my robes. That's why you found yourself where you did a few minutes ago."  
  
"Did they get whomever was responsible for it?"  
  
Oliver almost snorted. Trust Percy to think about punishment for infracted rules. "Aye. Not really enough, if you ask me, but McGonagall was so impressed with the fact that he managed the transfiguration that she gave them back half the points they lost."  
  
"That's a disappointment."  
  
Indeed. Oliver didn't know what to say next, so he nodded. He pulled out a stack of sheets and handed it to Percy. "It is. I've got your homework so you can catch up. You didn't really miss that much."  
  
He took the notes and started to skim them. "Thanks. I appreciate it."  
  
"No problem."  
  
The silence stretched uncomfortably between the two of them. Oliver wondered how he'd thought he'd begun to fall for Percy-they had nothing in common. Percy was always too serious, never willing to join in the pranks the twins pulled. He didn't like Quidditch. He couldn't appreciate a good bottle (or rather good five bottles) of butterbeer.  
  
The silence was beginning to strain itself.  
  
"Well. I'd better get going. It's almost time for Quidditch practice." He headed over to the door.  
  
Percy just nodded, not bothering to look up from the notes. "Good luck with that. I'm going to catch up on my studies."  
  
"All right then. Don't study too hard." He headed towards the door walking backward, trying to think of one last thing to say, but he couldn't.  
  
One day he would find a person who he could talk to as easily as he did the Percy-pin.  
  
Percy-human just wasn't that person.  
  
Feeling somehow lightened by this realization, Oliver headed off to practice, and swore that the next time someone got transfigured into a pin, he wouldn't be the one to take care of it. 


End file.
